New Mommy Blues

Noone ever said it would be easy being a mom. From sleepless nights to being under-appreciated and needing validation, we moms endure a lot! When my daughter Sophie was born she was admitted to the NICU for the first two days of her life and was given a bottle though I had expressed I wanted to breastfeed, resulting in a baby that didn't latch. I should consider myself lucky that she was only away from me for the first two nights, but at the time it felt like the end of the world. Feeling unattached and lonely (though my amazing husband and family were by my side) I struggled with feelings of sadness and inferiority. I felt too embarrassed by my less-than enthusiastic thoughts to talk to family, and truly thought I was the only one who felt this way.

We as women beat ourselves up when we don't attain this high level of classic mommy-figure/wife status. I spent endless days in the apartment hearing my baby scream every time I tried to feed her. I was pumping around the clock and trying to get my daughter to latch in between all these pumping sessions. Faith, a lactation consultant from Mercy hospital in South Florida, was my savior angel. Though she has done it for countless moms over the years, Faith relayed her endless breastfeeding tips and knowledge to me and continued to call and follow up and made me feel like I was not alone and that there was hope. Her best advice in the end was to "give the baby a bottle and enjoy her"! I began using my expressed milk to bottle-feed Sophie and tried only once a week to get her to latch on. After 8 arduous but well worthwhile weeks, Sophie finally latched on. It was okay that I was supplementing with formula (millions of brilliant people are bottle-fed!), it was okay that I didn't immediately feel a bond with my baby, and it was, and is, okay to talk about it and share my stories with others.

This is what I have come to learn over the past 11 months. As I slowly got out of the house, I began to 'pick up' mommies wherever I went. I would see a mom with her young baby at the grocery store, Starbucks, or a local park, and I would just go up to her, break the ice with "Hi, how old is your baby?" and if I felt like we would get along, I would suggest we exchange numbers. I got increasingly more adept at amassing groups of cool mommies that I not only got along great with and could share my true feelings, fears and triumphs with, but that got along well with eachother as well. One of my mommy-friends suggested I start a mommy-matching business and I took her advice! I created www.PlaygroupConnect.com. Mommies click on 'Get Started' and create a 'Mommy-Compatibility profile'. I then match them with like-minded moms in their area who have children close in age. This free service began in south Florida, has begun to expand to California and Montreal, Canada, and is getting ready to match in other states as well. Moms across the nation can fill out profiles, though if they're in an up-and-coming area they might have to be patient until enough mommies send in their profiles.

I feel like I have gone through SO much with Sophie from the day she came into my life, and others should benefit from my knowledge, mistakes and experiences. It has truly become my mission to help other moms overcome ANY issues they may be experiencing as they and their babies get to know eachother and grow. Please allow this blog to be a sounding board for your stories and help spread reassurance and hope to other moms out there!

Love,
Shannon
Founder
www.PlaygroupConnect.com